We live in diverse world where we can express ourselves in a variety of weird and wonderful ways. We all adopt our own distinctive styles and preferences, often including piercings, tattoos, fashion choices, and music taste.

I’m a firm believer of people doing whatever the fuck they want with their bodies—because it is nobody else’s business. So long as they’re not offending or hurting others, obviously.

While our individuality should be celebrated, it’s more important than ever that we communicate with respect and sensitivity when it comes to peoples’ style preferences—avoiding statements that may come across as insensitive or judgmental.

As an “alternative” online creator with a fair few tattoos, piercings, and a superior fashion sense (jokes)—I’m no stranger to back-handed compliments and outright offensive remarks on my style.

So here are a few of the things I, and many other alt people are sick of hearing in 2023:

“Are you trying to be cool and edgy?”

Yes. Yes I am. But that’s not why we dress/style ourselves the way we do. We embrace our unique style as a form of self-expression, not as a means to impress others—but if it does impress, that’s just an added bonus!

“You’ll regret all those tattoos someday.”

Whether you have two or fifty-two tattoos, I think every single inked person has received this comment or something similar before. Just as anyone else does, we make choices that resonate with us and our identity. It’s not hard to respect a person’s autonomy and understand that their choices may hold personal significance!

“I bet you’re kinky.”

Maybe I am. Maybe I’m not. Either way, I don’t think piercings, ink, or an alternative dress sense could ever possibly indicate whether or not someone likes being choked or whatever. The two are totally unrelated. Also, assuming anything about someone’s sexual preferences, alternative or not, is kinda… not your business.

“You’d look so much better if you dressed ‘normally.’”

First of all, beauty is subjective. Second, criticising anyone’s appearance because it doesn’t conform to societal norms is just disrespectful. Not to mention it’s only pushing harmful beauty standards.

“You’ll never get a good job with all those tattoos.”

Tattoos and piercings don’t define a person’s ability to excel in their career. And I don’t know about you, but I’m not interested in working for anyone or any company who has an issue with the way someone chooses to present themselves. It’s time to avoid making assumptions about someone’s capabilities based on their appearance.

*Touching without consent*

As you would with anyone else, respect personal boundaries. Tattoos, hair, or piercings aren’t excuses to touch, poke, or prod. It just isn’t appropriate, so always ask first, or better yet—keep your hands to yourself.

So really, respecting and understanding alternative people, just like anyone else, involves treating them with the same kindness and empathy as anyone else. Everyone’s style choices are expressions of their own individuality, and we should celebrate them—not judge.